Hmm.

Well, after some communication... I think my future is looking a little more put together... I have decided fairly surely what I am doing in January... and it will be the same thing I am doing after I get my CNA... working. Working, saving money, working, spending money when I need to, working, saving money, working, having fun and socializing, working, missing Eric, working, talking to him on the phone... :) Getting the picture? I will find some good scholarly books to read as well- maybe some things I can learn from, without them being too dry and boring... And definitely some more Terry Pratchett.
A big weight has fallen from me, having learned that my parents are not going to be disappointed with me if I don't go back to school in January... The choice to stay out of school for now has been in my mind for awhile... and while I do want more education eventually, January is not really the right timing for it. So I will work. And I will wait... though probably impatiently... for what comes next... I do know what I hope is coming next... though I shall try not to plan for it until I know for certain... :)

Things are looking up...
~Danette

Connect the dots...

I have too many possibilities right now- like I'm standing at a crossroads of fifteen different roads, and all of them have something good about them, and something bad either visible to me or lurking in the shadows... and in one way I want to say "none of them are good- I want to fly away instead"... and at the same time, I do know which of the roads is most appealing to me- but it is also the one that trusted people tell me is fraught with danger... and so I wait- trying to find a suitable path for me right now- the one that God wants. I wish I could just make what I want automatically mold to be what God wants- or rather I wish I could make what God wants be what I want, and be able to choose selfishly... but I can't. And I wouldn't really exactly want to... I'm confused. Now would be a really good time for God to float me down a heavenly post-it note telling me what his plan for me is- or just the little immediate part of it- if I knew what He wanted me to do just this year... just after I finish my CNA.. where he wanted me to work, and for how long... I could deal with it. But it won't happen. And yet I still need to know what's going on.. what I can do about it all...
I am sure that at one level, this entire experience is meant to teach me to trust God more- because it is so easy for me to take my plans, call them MINE, and run with them, rather than letting Him choose my path... and then I am confused because I do know that as one pastor said recently in a message I heard- "God doesn't care WHAT you do nearly as much as HOW you do it, and how you live"... Whether you're a plumber or an executive or a missionary- your goal is the same- to glorify God in everything you do- and responsibilities remain the same- fulfill the great commission, be a witness, show God's love, etc...
I have this dream in my head of what I would love to have happen to me- where I'd like to be in 5 or 10 years... it would be me married to Eric, perhaps having the beginnings of a family, (a child or two) him working with his theatre ministry, (which would be flourishing,) and whatever else he had to do for work,... me probably working part time at a nursing home or hospital or somewhere with my CNA (like on some weekends or a few nights per week,)... or with massage therapy or pharmacy technician (or something else that God brings to me to learn).... (part time, however that would work)... and homeschooling whatever children I have... I can imagine it- that if I was working on one day, children would be with Eric and his theatre stuff- learning things from him, and getting quite an education... and then other days I'd be home teaching them their math and reading and science and history and everything else.... and helping Eric however I am able, being involved with his ministry and everything else.... and this would most likely come to take place in the northwest- OR or WA, and then there'd also be the closeness to Amy, and just... good. That's how it kind of plays out in my head, anyway... :)

My problem is it feels like a connect-the-dots with two dots and a massive blank space in the middle- like the picture is supposed to be something particular, but somebody went and erased all the dots between the beginning and the end- and while I can see where I want to end up, I have no idea how I am supposed to get there, what paths will be in the middle or how things will be shaped or what they will look like.

Crumbling...

What are you supposed to do when the path starts to crumble in front of you? When the bridge that you were going to cross over collapses? Today I found out that the massage therapy program that I wanted to get into this January is full with a waiting list... and so I won't be doing that... so now I am unsure of what's supposed to happen. I thought everything was falling together so well... I was getting (still am) my CNA... I actually worked with a CNA my first night of clinicals who was a massage therapist at the hospital as well... that was really neat!.... and now, the crash-and-burn aspect. Maybe why I am trying so hard not to plan big things, is that it really hurts when they smash... and it's confusing when I don't know what I am supposed to do next. I'm not at UWEC anymore... so it's not like I'm in the middle of a program, and think "OK.. I just do this next year, and the next...etc....." and be done that way. I was taking a short program that would be done in early August. And now what? I don't know!
I just feel like I wish I could have Eric here to give me a hug and make everything better... even if he just hugged me and let me cry on his shoulder... I miss him. And this makes me miss him more... and confuses what is going on in my life... when will I be done with school? What will I do?
It's also difficult to be having all of this happen when to top it off I feel quite isolated right now. It may not be true reality- but it's the reality that I feel and see and experience... that right now I don't fit in. At all. I don't know why this is- because I fit in all right last year... didn't I? Or was it just that I hadn't yet experienced fitting in at all... and now, coming from a place that I fit, and then going to another place that I fit, and meeting a person that I fit with... and now being here, where I feel like a round peg in a square hole- I am in a space that is big enough for me- but there are gaps, and it doesn't fit right... it goes through the hole and I survive... but not comfortably, not happily, not easily...
I wish I could take a photograph of my heart and post it for all of the Christians in my life to see- to let them know what I need, how I am feeling and what's going on for me... because it's too difficult to share it with so many people- I don't believe there are any people at my church right now that I really would be willing to be accountable to... just because it's weird... and somehow I don't want to be quite that close to them... I think. I want someone to come into my life like I came to a friend's.... where I would feel comfortable sharing anything at all- anything I was dealing with, anything I was struggling with or doing wrong/right.... anything. But that takes a certain relationship with that person... it takes trusting them fully not to reveal what you tell them to people that don't need to know... and trusting that they're not going to start treating you differently just because you share something you're struggling with... and someone who you can know will be praying for you every day- whether you've talked to them that day or not. And I guess, at some level... I don't have that type of person in my life, anywhere close to home. There's a wonderful lady in TX that has managed to be some of this for me- but she's not here. Eric would be a LOT, if not almost all of this for me... but he hasn't married me yet- and so there are certain things I don't feel like I need to tell him.
I am so drained lately- of energy, both emotional and some physical- I'm tired of dealing with the frustration of not fitting in, of having plans cave in, of having to figure out new things to do, and to try to understand what kind of timing will work for things... I want to be done... and I can't be. I want to just hide away and not have to come out for about a week and a half- and just spend that time the way I need (and want) to- reading my bible, thinking, praying, probably reading a book or two, and recharging... (and of course, I'd probably be talking to Eric and Peg and perhaps Robin too, some) and yet, I can't really do that.... but I am just tired. Tired of waiting for school to be all over, and for time to pass so new things can happen, and waiting until I can see Eric again, and waiting for everything else that I am waiting for....

"Let patience have its perfect work"...... grr. That pops into my head- I do need to be patient... but.. but.... it's so difficult!

Rememberings...

Yesterday I opened up my Gmail account to a very specific collection of messages. They were all of the ones I've ever received from Eric. (Yes, Eric.. I have them all... I hope that doesn't scare you...) I went back to the beginning of the file... and started reading. It was so neat to look at how I have grown, and how so much has changed since the early days of knowing Eric.. to now. Yes, I met him in person in June... and it hasn't been all that long chronologically since then... but let's see... the first contact I had with him was January 31st... :-) And since then, it has been awhile.
Reading what Eric wrote to me, and what I wrote to him... I saw that we really did manage to maintain a friendship-only relationship throughout the time before June 12th.. the day I arrived at camp... Then a week into camp, came the question... "Where are we going with this? What do you want out of this right now?"... and my answer, "I am waiting to be pursued..." and thus the pursuing of Danette began.. :-) Through the summer I came to know Eric closer and better... and began to love him. I thought hard about everything that was happening to me... was I infatuated, or was I being foolish? Or was it just reality that I had found my prince? I wrote a blog post about my confusion, quite awhile back.. I believe it's titled "Love..."
Farther and farther into the summer... I discovered that I had indeed, found my prince. He was willing to protect and encourage me... and he did so on several occasions. He was and is a complete gentleman, and I felt like a princess around him. I was able to be utterly comfortable around him, and felt like if it were prudent, I could be comfortable with telling him anything... (though I refrain somewhat because he is not YET able to be my closest confidant and friend... because there's a certain ceremony that has to precede that.)
So much has happened in my life this year- from the venturing off to college last fall, to dealing with living with my grandmother, to living in the dorms, and having a biblestudy with girls my age, to really having a social life for the first time, to being on my own, being independent for a semester... to meeting Eric, and working at camp, and all that went along with it- good and bad- and growing to love him so much it hurts- as I wait impatiently for the time when I get to see him again- sometimes I miss him so much I want to cry (and occasionally shed a few tears)... and when I talk to him, I often wish I could reach through the phone line and give him a hug... (or maybe have WonkaVision, and be transported through the television...though perhaps at much less of a size reduction)
This year I was the vice president of an organization, I organized buying our pro-life t-shirts and gave the idea of bracelets to Carla... I shared my burdens when family was going through difficult situations and circumstances, and prayed with the many Christian friends I had.
It was amazing how many Christians there are at UWEC... I sorely wish I could be back there... but at the same time I know God has another plan for me... and UWEC isn't part of it. It was a part- a very important part.. but now it's over... and this next part seems to be one in which I learn how to survive the dry time when I don't have the same level of fellowship, the same environment... and perhaps a time of me dealing with my pride and hurt stemming from us leaving Calvary in Barron- with the no-contact from members, and the rejection I felt when none of the kids seemed to be friendly when I saw them... though to begin with, I always felt like I was on the outside... never the inside. At school, I got the greatest blessing when I had people tell me "don't be cautious about sitting with us at dinner- if we're here, you're welcome." I had been eating by myself for quite awhile- all because I was too concerned about intruding on the others... It meant so much to me to have people invite me to do things with them- and it made me feel wanted and included... that's one thing that seems kind of missing here back at home- Kimmy invited me to go with her on her errands to Rice Lake today. That was nice... but not the same.... and she's only one person.

a watched pot never what??

Why is it that whenever we are paying attention to something, or we are trying to wait for something, or count something... it always seems to take longer, than when we're enjoying something, or wishing it would last longer?
The microwave, for example. You can set it for 3 minutes.... and the seconds seem to last forever. A pot of water that's supposed to boil... it takes forever if you're waiting for it.
Class takes forever if you are waiting for it to be over, and waiting in line at the DMV... yeah.. that actually DOES take forever... but... the other stuff doesn't!
Contrasting, whenever you're enjoying a moment so much you want it to keep going forever... it only lasts a moment. The summer that I would have liked to have last indefinitely, was over right on schedule... and my time to spend with people I love seems to evaporate whenever I desire it.
I suppose this should make me think about the fact that if I stop paying attention to the waiting, it will go faster, and I should start paying more attention to the people I love that are here, and have more time with them...
but.... even though I see that as true... and that I need to DO something with the time I have... that doesn't make it easy. It doesn't make it easy to put out of my mind what I WANT to focus on... and to think about other things, other things I can do...


But I will be trying.



~Danette

Cold....

I am sitting here typing this blog entry, and my fingers are freezing... it's cold. I'm being a wimp... it's supposedly 70 degrees in the house... but outside it's 45 degrees.... (claims on weather.com that it feels like 40 outside...) and a bit windy... and... brr.

Thank you God for heaters... now I just have to wait until my dad turns ours on.... Every fall it's always a matter of "How long can we last without the heater?".... the same goes for the A/C in the summer... :-)

Verses for the day: Romans 5:1-11

"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation."

Things about me...

1. I like giving people things. I love having occasions to give people gifts... I don't have to receive a lot of them... but I love giving them to people. I had an enormous amount of fun the other day, assembling a box of goodies to send to Eric... because as I was finding things, I was thinking about how he would like them, what he would think when he opened the box, whether he'd appreciate some of the stuff I put in there... and what I could do to make it more special... It wasn't till I was shopping that I remembered some of his likes and dislikes... (i.e. looking at things with chocolate because he likes chocolate... but this one and that one, that looked good... also had nuts in them... and he said he didn't like nuts......and "ooh... I know he likes that...") and it was fun... hunting for things... and thinking about him...

2. Music is important to me. Whether I am driving along in my car by myself, or sitting at my computer at home, or taking a walk... Music is important in my life. It calms me down sometimes when I am frustrated or upset, it relaxes me when I am stressed, I sing my praises to God with it, and I enjoy it.

3. Sometimes I upset people on accident... I don't mean to, but it happens. I am a sensitive person, and it makes me sad to know that I upset someone. But it hurts more to upset someone, and then find out later that I did so, than it does for them to tell me right away. I still don't like knowing I hurt someone... but knowing is better than not knowing.
Some of the time this upsetting people is done, though inadvertently, because of selfishness... I push too hard or complain about something when I shouldn't... and someone's feelings are hurt. And then, especially if it's someone I love a lot... it makes me sad. It brings tears to
my eyes on occasion.

4. I like to plan things. This gets the best of me sometimes... I plan things, look forward to them, pay a lot of attention to them, and then have them crumble... after spending too much energy in them... Or, alternately, I plan something, and then, because I planned it, feel obligated to stick with it... like when I was a nursing major at UWEC. I would have been willing to stick with that major and everything through the end of my school stuff... and getting my degree... all because I COULD, and could enjoy learning, and taking the classes.... but when I got out of school... I would have a degree, yes, but not necessarily for any other reason than "I followed through." Or any of a multitude of times in my life... when I make a decision, I have this thing about sticking with them... it's probably both good AND bad...

5. I can't always communicate things the way that I mean them. If I have an awkward topic to broach, if I can't manage to bring it up properly, and it comes out kind of passively... it's still something important to me... and I just couldn't communicate it right. Sometimes I write something and it's perceived differently than it was meant... but generally, that means I didn't look at it enough afterwards to see if it was expressed properly.

6. I am somewhat of a perfectionist. This is sometimes expressed by me working very hard to do a task correctly, and also by me desiring and expecting other people to do the same. Sometimes it can be hard for me to comprehend that other people do not share my work ethic and the need I have to get a job done right. Sometimes I give myself too much stress, by choosing to do things myself, rather than ask for help, when I know that another person would not care as much about doing it right. I would rather take a long time doing a job well, than run over it quickly and have my boss look at it later and see how bad it was. Sometimes this characteristic disappears temporarily when I'm at home with my parents, and sometimes I find myself being quite careless... whereas if I was working at a business, or at camp, or somewhere else, I would be doing my best. This is a reality, but not one that I am trying to excuse.

7. I am an overachiever. I often worked too hard at college last year, because I would be set on studying WELL, and doing everything precisely right. As time went on, I learned that I could sometimes skip the studying, and STILL get the A... depending on the class... If I got less than an A, I was disappointed, and scolded myself for not working hard enough... because I know I can do well enough to get As. If I got too many grades that weren't an A... (like that most of my quizzes in my ANTH 315 class were 16/20 and 17/20... which look like such small numbers when I look at them, along side all of the red squiggles on the paper) I began to worry that I wouldn't get a very good grade in the class.... (in the aforementioned class, I ended up getting an A after all...) It's almost... disappointing that my CNA class is not requiring much brainpower work at all... very simple things my teacher says, and teaches... and the tests are easy... and I feel like I always know the answers to the teacher's questions... and then I try not to answer them, so I don't look like a know-it-all... *sigh*

8. I like lists today.

9. I started another blog, called "Ispiratio"... It is the more thoughtful/devotional type writing I've done.
:-)

10. I will continue with lists another day. For now, this is enough.

... Danette

lacking...

I seem to be lacking "normal" post subjects... and I must apologize, I've currently nothing so "thoughtful" to post as I did before...

There IS something about fire that I wrote a couple of weeks ago.. here that is...

----I was sitting in front of the campfire tonight, watching the embers ripple and glow in the flames. The fire danced in the firepit, and Brita and Hanne giggled as they rolled in the grass tickling each other. The crickets chirped in the night, but the bugs generally stayed away from the heat of the fire. The radiant heat felt good on my face, and I almost wished that there was another fire behind me, so that all of me could be bathed in the toasty warmth that emanated from the pit. It was so beautiful. So deadly and dangerous fire is... and yet it is delicate looking, and gorgeous.
It makes me think about how similarities may be drawn from that, to relationships. A fire is good for warmth, but if it gets out of hand, it can burn down forests. What was so trusted inside a campfire ring is deadly, dangerous, and destructive if it gets out of control. Our passions have been likened to a flame, and I see that is a very accurate depiction. If we do not take measures to contain our passions properly, they can be as destructive as the flame that spread into a wildfire and destroyed forests. Without restraint, we can be easily tempted to go too far in our physical and emotional relationships, and without guards set beforehand, these passions can take control and things can happen that we really come to regret.



And now something new.

There is an apple tree in my yard... It is very old, weathered,with gnarled branches, but full of fruit. It has had a very long, somewhat eventful life... Branches have died, a storm ripped off a whole half of the tree, part of the trunk rotted, birds have attacked its apples... and every year, we go and pull the apples it has worked so hard to grow off the tree for harvest. Its roots are deep, its fruit beautiful, and the tree is quite hardy.
In our lives, we come across so many things that are difficult, or hurtful, or unpleasant... but through these, God can take us, and grow us, and teach us things. When the apple tree was small, it had weak roots, could not bear much fruit, and could not survive very much in the way of harsh elements. As it grew, it became stronger, the roots dug deeper and were anchored more sturdily, and its fruit became more abundant. One day, the tree was lush and beautiful, bearing much fruit... and then the storm came. Half the tree was destroyed. Some of its branches died. Birds pecked holes in its beautiful apples... and yet, the tree continued to grow. It stood resolutely in the yard. The master gardener many times, considered uprooting it and throwing it into the bonfire... but each time, the tree would produce more fruit than the master gardener expected, and the tree would be spared. After all of the damage that the tree sustained, it only produced more fruit. It became stronger through the trials and tests, and more productive. You see, it was pruned. We had not pruned it in our entire lives, but God pruned the apple tree, when he sent that storm through... It was a rather drastic job of pruning, but it was necessary, and improved the tree.
When we have hard things happen to us, when we have our "branches", our hopes and dreams and plans crumble, what does it do for us? When a major disaster comes through our lives, and we cannot understand why, how do we react to it? The apple tree reacted to the storm with growth and strength... Are you willing to let God grow and strengthen you, amidst disaster?

Class...

Though I am very happy that I am getting to take my CNA class right now... I miss UWEC! I miss the English classes, and the giggling and having fun with friends down the hall, and the being free to do as I saw fit, and going to Bible-study with my Christian friends, and going to Jacob's Well church on Sundays, and going out to coffee with my grandmother on Wednesdays, and always being busy, or having some down-time as well, and the sense of community, etc...etc...etc...... It was so much fun. And so growing. And now I am back here, at home. Or rather, the home I grew up in.... I don't exactly fit the same way anymore. And I don't even want to consider that if I am still around after Brita goes to college... I will REALLY not fit... and feel lazy, and etc...etc...etc...

I think it's good for me to be here at home... because it makes me grow and learn in different ways... Especially patience. I am having to learn patience... though somewhat involuntarily. I don't want to wait around for an indefinite amount of time for my Daddy to tell me what he thinks of Eric. I don't want to have to wait, to have to have the time pass, for me to finish classes. I just want to have my credentials now, and be done... But I am waiting... I am learning patience... and it will continue, I suspect, until I have learned it.

On the brighter side, God has been moving a lot of things in my path to be there precisely right... I believe that the CNA program was what He had for me... I learned in class the other day, that this class generally has a waiting list, and it can be hard to get into at times... I decided to take the course some time in the end of July... and had no problems getting in. I am surprised that this is so, and all I can chalk it up to, is that I am following an acceptable path, and God is enabling me... I also learned that to get reciprocity for my CNA in another state, there's basically a form to fill out... and that's it. And my massage therapy program lets me become a nationally-registered massage therapist... so I won't have problems with that transferring....

I just finished reading "Boy Meets Girl" by Joshua Harris... I was surprised with it. I expected that the book would basically say "Don't go out on a "date" by yourselves"... and to completely submit to parental authority concerning relationships, and a whole lot of other stuff similar to that. But it doesn't. It says "Don't act in a way that isn't backed up by your level of commitment,"..."alone-time as a couple is important... but don't make ALL your time this way".... "Make your choices with counsel... but that doesn't mean you are to let your counsel make your decisions for you... YOU are the one that needs to have faith and be willing to marry another person... We are called to honor our parents- and that means listening to their counsel and considering it carefully... But since we are adults, we are not obligated to OBEY our parents in all things anymore... "... so... wow. It was different than expected... and it was refreshing. That the same guy who wrote "I kissed dating goodbye" is not saying that you cannot essentially "date" someone else... just not recreationally, or without serious intent. Courtship is another name, basically, for dating with a goal in mind- to determine whether or not a person is the one you will marry. It's not a rigid set of rules, but a mindset- and I found that really interesting to read, and made me go "wow... I can handle that..."... and made me realize that we haven't been doing anything really that different from Joshua Harris' book...
So it also helped me realize that I have been going about having my parents' approval in the wrong way... at least, I think so right now..... I desire their approval, but it is not so incredibly vital that it is impossible to proceed without it. I desire it, and I am giving them a chance to grant it... and I will listen to their advice concerning my relationship... but unless their concerns are valid and biblical ones... I do not have to follow the advice. It makes me relax and remember that there are still MY choices... not my parents... and though I love them, and desire to honor them, ultimately, it will not be their decision...
I hope my post doesn't worry or scare anyone who's been reading it... :-) but oh well if it does. So... bother me about it? You're welcome to, if you think it's necessary.

~Danette

Every day...

You know that song "Day by day"... Part of the lyrics go, "Day by day, and with each passing moment, strength I find, to meet my trials here" Well... that's what's been happening for me lately... If it wasn't for that grace and strength, all of life would seem so overwhelmingly busy and frustrating and difficult... But..."....His promises, they fail not.....no cause for worry or for fear" When I can put my worries in God's hands, he who promised never to leave me or forsake me, and he who cares more than anyone else about all of my silly little problems and struggles... and the God, who gives us abundantly more than we ask, can help me to overcome my struggles and problems, relax in the safety of his care, and bask in the sunshine of his love. It doesn't matter now, if I have to wait for something I've been looking forward to... God is in control, and knows what's best for me. It doesn't have to bother me that I don't know what's happening for sure beyond today, or that I don't have an idea of what's happening beyond Christmas break... Whatever happens, will be in God's perfect timing.
I should mention that I am writing this as much to tell about what I have, as to remind myself of it... I try to plan things too far ahead, and think too far in advance about what is to come, and get overly concerned about it when I don't need to be. But I'm working on it. And He's working on me. :-)

Time, and waiting.

Sometimes it seems as if we are called to wait... to let time pass, before a certain thing can come into being... and other times, we're told "Don't waste your time!" or, "hurry- don't waste time now," or, "You're wasting time- don't wait for life to come to you.. go get it!"...
The question is, which times are best to wait and let time float by, and which situations should we take as they come at us, and run with them? There are a lot of things that I've experienced, in which it's best to just sit and wait for the right time or person or place for something... I did wait for a very special person to enter my life... but now, what kind of waiting do I need to do? If I already know who this special person is, and I know what I am willing to do for, and go through with this person... why wait indefinitely for the end that the two of us see as coming? I feel like there have been two choices- one a straight path to the edge of the unknown... the other a winding wiggly path, to the same place. If I know that's to be my destination... is there any reason to prolong the journey? But yet, this path that I must take seems to have checkpoints along the way... no shortcuts allowed. I must stop at the first checkpoint and receive permission and approval, before my travel-permit is stamped and given over to me, to continue my journey to the next checkpoint... and on it goes... and then I get to the end of my walking path, where I must wait for someone to come and invite me to continue on in their company...
...with all of this journey taken with only a general guidebook, and my Saviour helping me along the way.
I feel like there is that other, that straight path, which is out of bounds... which I would have to circumvent that first checkpoint to reach... and I would get to my destination much earlier, much less patiently, with less waiting... but when I would reach it, I would be in an entirely different state of being than by following the checkpoints and the rules, because I would reach it having broken the law that was set forth for me, and that which I have agreed to abide by.

I hope I have been properly abstract in this post... and yet.. that the right people will know who and what I am talking about... (if you think you're one of those right people, and you don't get it... email me. I'll explain.
Love,
Danette

Long walk...

Whew!

I am finally back from my walk.. .I left right around 1:20... and I just got back... I walked up through Hillsdale and turned on the road that parallels Hwy 25 behind our property, (and someone else's in between ours and the road), and then after walking the length of that road back to where our property would be on the other side, I walked back, through the field of pine trees, and back into our property... except, and I always do this when I try going BACK through the woods...I get turned around inside those woods, and come out somewhere NOT where I thought I would... So I walked through the woods, ducking under branches and dodging brambles, (and walking through some spiderwebs, and having leaves and bugs bop me in the face..) up hills and down valleys, and finally, made it to the edge of the woods. Except it was the edge of the woods that was next to someone else's field... not ours. And I felt bad wandering through someone else's field to get to the road, and back to my house... so I just headed back up into the woods... albeit this time with a much better bearing on my location and which direction I needed to go... So then I just walked (hey, through some less brush-filled parts of woods... lots of pine trees had killed off most of the underbrush) through the pine trees and maple trees and oak trees and aspen trees and fir trees and poplar trees, and deer bushes and goldenrod and briars and thorn trees, and back towards home... When I got most of the way past the other person's field, the woods got a little messier, (the goldenrod and briars and thorn trees... plus some additional ancient barbed wire fence, and some more underbrush,) so I walked at the edge of the field, (through all of the goldenrod that was nearly as tall as I am... and the dead crunchy stuff, and thistles, and milkweed and grass... long grass.) until I got to the end of it, which is the border between our neighbor's property, and ours. So then I was back on our land.. and walking through the very thick alfalfa hay field, and picking a few flowers off the alfalfa as I went... to join the black-eyed-suzans and miniature daisies and other flowers that I found along my way.. (well.. all of them got found in the last stretch.. walking through the goldenrod I found the black-eyed suzans, and the daisies were in our alfalfa field... ) ... Now they're in a mason jar and look pretty...
Other than a couple of scratches on my legs, (and I think, a bit of sunburn) I am in one piece... but I remembered now, why I don't normally go walking that direction THROUGH the woods for exercise... it's really GOOD exercise... but not quite as fun as I'd like... partially because of all the gnats and mosquitoes and spider-webs, (and me walking face-first into them, and wondering if I've then got a spider on my head...)... But it was pretty out there.
And sorry... I didn't take any pictures, because it was cumbersome to bring my camera, and have to carry it the whole time.
Maybe next time
(oh... here is one added for your enjoyment post facto...

~Danette